The internet has brought me together with so many people that I would never have met in real life, and the majority I never will meet in real life, but I still consider them friends. That's why, when someone I've never met, who lives 3000 miles away, loses her husband, my heart aches for her.
This is a woman who I had the chance to meet via the internet back in 2002. We were both women who kept a journal on a website for moms. Our stories were very different--I was already the mom to two kids, she was struggling with infertility. It hurt to read her struggles, but then it was wonderful to be able to rejoice with her when she finally did get pregnant. It was even more amazing for her when she was able to have another son. They seemed to have the perfect family--her husband was a stay-at-home dad and volunteer firefighter. She was a teacher at a prestigious college in Vermont. She has a lot of the same beliefs as I do, and I seem to relate to her a lot. When we both stopped keeping a journal on the website, she started a blog and I followed it religiously. It was great to read about her and her family and what they were doing.
When I learned on FB on Saturday that her husband had been killed, it really struck me hard. A senseless car accident took away a father and husband and forever tore apart a family. It hit me really hard because hubby and I had just had a fairly large fight, but now it seems petty. I was mad and hurt and left the house. Then I saw this and just felt like if it could happen to them, it could happen to anyone. It made me realize that what we had disagreed about had been petty. Just a lot of pent up frustration that came out all at once. But it made me realize that we can't let petty things get to us. We need to say, "I love you," and kiss each other goodbye.
I read her blog today, and it broke my heart. Her oldest son has a broken leg, she and her younger son are banged and bruised, but to hear that the four-year old is having nightmares, just is wrong. No child should have to be there when their father dies in a situation like that. No child should have their father die like that.
If we lived close, I would be over there, cleaning her house, cooking meals, anything to help lessen her burden right now. She deserves to just "be" with her boys right now.
I know I'm rambling, but this just really makes me sad. And, it makes me realize that even if you have never met someone in real life, they are real and they do matter and their pain can make you ache for them.